May 3, 2018 at 10:10 am #24275
I am 47. I’ve had 3 sexually partners my entire life.I have been exclusively with, I have not even kissed another person, my current partner, husband, for the past 25 years. Sept 2017 I had, didn’t know what it was at the time, a herpes genital breakout.My local doctor did HSV1&2 testing w/ full sexually transmitted disease panel.Antibodies tests for HSV1 & 2,& all other tests were neg, but a PCR test of a lesion tested pos for HSV1. When I talked to my husband about my completely shocking results, he confessed that 3-4 weeks earlier, Aug 2017, he had an affair with a random stranger. He too had some symptoms causing him to be seen, but his Dr did not find anything. He had a full sexually transmitted disease panel done as well given his infidelity – everything neg. Given the newly found out infidelity, these results did not make sense. How am I HSV1 pos & he be completely neg when he admitted to both oral &vaginal sex with the stranger & I had never done ANYTHING w/ANYONE.I could not accept these results as him getting oral sex, then having sex with me & my breakout being vaginal made logical sense to my Dr. & me, in addition to the timeline making sense.I pushed this further, both getting a Western Blot test. Results the same, me HSV1 pos, him all neg.No scenario makes sense. I was told you pass HSV1 with skin to skin contact & that you get the breakout at the ingestion sight. Well, I did not have ANY type of sex, nor did I kiss anyone, but my husband, so how is this possible? I was told, if I had HSV1 & gave my husband oral sex & then we had vaginal sex, that that could have triggered my genital herpes breakout. If this would be the case, why does he still test neg? Nothing I put together explains my pos result & I can’t accept this. So, this leads me to my question, could my husband been exposed to HSV1 via oral sex with the stranger, had vaginal sex with me triggering my outbreak, but him not actually get herpes? Could he of just passed it? I’m totally lost:(
May 6, 2018 at 6:45 pm #24318
So let me be certain I’ve got this absolutely correct. You both had western blots through the University of Washington and he was negative for both and you were positive for 1 but negative for 2?
You mention that you’ve had sex with three people in your life – one of them being your husband. Did you receive oral sex from the other two? It is possible that you contracted this years and years ago and are now having an outbreak that you recognize.
I think it is possible that the affair has nothing to do with this outbreak.
Also, how long after he had sex with that person did he have the western blot done?
May 7, 2018 at 8:17 am #24359
You are correct regarding the western blot tests and results.
As far as oral sex from my two previous sexual partners, I can’t answer that with 100% confidence. I feel I can say with 98% confidence that I did not with my very first partner. We were young, 1987-1990. I was not on the pill at that time so we always used protection.I don’t know if I even really knew what oral sex was at that time,so I feel no, but can’t say 100%.With my second partner of 3 years, I truly don’t recall us having oral sex, but I was older then, on the pill, we had unprotected sex, but I can’t say with or without certainty about oral sex this person.I don’t really like oral sex even today,so I would lean toward no, but don’t remember; this would have been in 1990 – 1993.I know no matter what that it would have been limited if we did. Given this, it makes it hard for me to accept that with only having two previous partners and either no or limited oral sex, that the timing was just right to contract HSV-1 and then have it for possibly 30 years before having a breakout.I do not recall either person having cold sores in my time with them.
Well, given my husband’s neg results, I guess I have to agree that it was not from the affair, but this scenario makes all the tests and timelines fit; so it is hard to let this go.
He has the affair, we have sex twice in 2 days about 3 weeks after the affair.The following week, he has enough of a symptom (pain during urination)to go in(probably because of his affair).Later that same week I go in.His comes back as nothing, mine comes back as HSV1.He admits to oral sex w/the affair partner.I can’t recall for sure if we did or didn’t have oral sex during those 2 days that we had sex. But, this scenario fits the timeline of events and would explain why my first antibody test was neg.
He had the affair early/mid Aug 2017 & his blood draw for the western blot test was 4/13/18. Just hard to believe my limited activity was the right timing, & shows up 30 yrs later
May 8, 2018 at 8:00 am #24377
Well, this is all very difficult to explain, I would agree.
what was the time frame of you getting a positive swab test for HSV 1 and you doing the western blot?
May 9, 2018 at 7:04 am #24395
The swab test was taken on Sept 9, 2017 (my initial breakout), and my blood draw for the Western Blot was done on April 12, 2018.
Things rattling around in my head:
1. How common is it for someone to supposedly have HSV1 for 25 – 30 years before getting an initial breakout? I have read that the first breakout is typically the worst and mine was pretty bad, so feeling like it was the first. I have not had any symptoms since. I truly find this hard to believe that conditions, whatever that may be – low immunity, stress, sun exposure, etc, were never right for that long for this to appear before now.
2. I know that the antibody test is wrong 25% showing a false neg. (Per UW Washington statistic) So if I’ve had this for 25 – 30 years, really I just haphazardly am part of that 25% that my first antibody test was wrong when it came back neg??? Seems too odd that it could be present that long and the test miss it given 25% of missing it is not a big number in the first place.
It’s hard not having validated answers to when/how I got HSV1. But I am feeling like I have zero avenues left to explore to try to get some piece of mind on this. I was told to try to figure out how to put this in a box and put it on a shelf;harder said than done.
I read another post where the person noted their doctors were very passive about this;no big deal. I feel the doctors here were the same. Never once did they tell me about Western Blot; I found it myself by surfing the internet. They just wanted me to believe I got HSV1 from my husband, from the affair,& his neg antibodies tests were wrong but they couldn’t explain it. No one seems to care, especially about HSV1 even compared to HSV2. Per UW Washington – really not much for studies, trials or cures in the works for HSV1. This is very disappointing as being in a marriage where one is pos & one isn’t is life changing. Everyone keeps saying how common this is, then why isn’t more being done to educate people & find a cure? Disappointing.
May 12, 2018 at 11:46 am #24440
I can say with a high degree of certainty that it is very possible for have genital HSV 1 for years and then have a recurrences with no recognized primary. I have seen this several times. HSV 1 just doesn’t like the genital area much.
There is one other possibility – do you think your husband could be taken antiviral therapy without you knowing it? That would prevent him from making antibody for a long time. Just throwing ideas around out there.
I know it is frustrating for you to not know where this came from or from whom, but I think you really have exhausted your options for sorting it out. You are unlikely to recur often with the HSV 1 so that’s at least some good news.
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