Risk of Transmission

[Worried123]

Hi, I am 47 years old and have had genital herpes for 20 years. I rarely have outbreaks. I do not take antiviral med because I was in a long term relationship and didn’t realize they were available. I will now though! I have a new partner who is not infected. I did not have any outbreaks or notice any prodrome symptoms prior to sex with him. We had sex twice (both times with a condom) in the same night…the last time doggy style and I was dry. It hurt when he entered and i felt pinching. Two days after sex I felt a tear or fissure outside my vagina at the posterior fourchette on the left side (where I felt the pinching). The day after that I started my period and have ezperienced what i think are poat-herpectic sensations in my legs. How likely is it that I transmitted this to my partner? Could I have been shedding or is my outbreak a result of friction caused by rougher sex, not enough lubrication and using a condom? Thank you for your help.

[Terri Warren]

If you had sex both times with a condom, then the risk of you infecting him is low but not zero. Did the condoms stay intact? Is he aware that you have herpes? If you had inadequate lubrication, the pinching feeling could certainly be from that and not a herpes outbreak. Did you feel a tear or see a tear? Have you actually developed what is, normally for you, an outbreak? Yes, you could have been shedding virus, even without any symptoms, yes, and that an happen at any time, not just when you think you might be getting an outbreak.

Terri

[Worried123]

Thank you for getting back to me so quickly Terri. Yes, the condoms stayed intact and I did see a tear. It is very small and open, but there is no pus or oozing. I am not sure what a true outbreak is for me anymore because it has been so long. Unfortunately, I did not tell him about my status because after being in a long-term relationship and my head in the clouds I did not give it enough serious consideration. Shame on me. Now I am freaking out that (a) I could have transmitted it to him and (b) I have to tell him and explain why I didn’t let him know beforehand. I feel terrible. Thank you.

[Terri Warren]

Sorry about the delay in responding, I’ve been dealing with some personal health issues.

If he is going to get symptoms from a first infection, he would likely have them within 2 to 10 days. Yes I think if you continue to see him, you’ll need to have the talk. It is impossible to know if he might have become infected without testing and now is too soon. However, he may wish to get a baseline IgG antibody test to see if he may already be infected, prior to his contact with you.

Terri

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