Who gave me herpes

[bonnie_1987]

Please help. I know sometimes it’s almost impossible to pin down who you caught herpes from but I’m hoping you can please tell the likelyhood of who I got it from or your opinion?

Guy 1 been together 5 years unprotected sec. I’ve never had any blisters down below the occasional feeling uncomfortable due to sex and thrush sometimes. Also had a baby with guy 1 and nothing was brought up during my pregnancy altho they don’t test for it in the uk during pregnancy. Guy 1 not had any sores that I know of.

Guy 2. Split from guy 1 and had unprotected sex with guy 2. 20 days later around 3 weeks I came up with 2 painful sores. Went to the clinic had a swab who confirmed herpes type 2. By this time I had got back together with guy 1 a week after sleeping with guy 2. We continued to have unprotected sex.
9 weeks after I was diagnosed with herpes I wanted guy 1 to get checked. He never had any sores or symptoms so had a Igg blood test that came back at 8.95 after 9 weeks

My question is did this come from guy 1 or 2?
If guy 1 then why hadn’t I had a outbreak in the 5 years. And if I gave it to him why hasn’t he had a primary outbreak. Also would he have had a index value of 8.95 after 9 weeks?

If guy 2. Would I have sores 20 days after sex with him? I am not able to get him tested

Maybe I gave it to guy 1?

Please can I have your opinion.

[bonnie_1987]

Can I just say after I was diagnosed in October 2017 I have had 5 maybe 6 outbreaks that I have recognised. Quite a lot. Even tho guy 1 is positive surely If it came from him I would have had some sort of outbreak in them 5 years? Do you think he’s only positive with index of 8.95 cause I gave it to him and he tested positive 9 weeks after exposure?

[Terri Warren]

I surely do wish I could help you here but I’m afraid I can’t since his blood test was done nine weeks after you got back together. Am I reading that correctly? Given that you had no lesions during that time were with Guy one for five years and then showed up with lesions 20 days after beginning sex with guy 2, to me guy two seems the more likely source.

terri

[bonnie_1987]

That’s right he was tested 9 weeks after we git back together. He tested positive 8.95 after 9 weeks of sleeping with me. Would a igg index value of 8.95 be possible after 9 weeks?? Also If this is a new infection for guy 1 from me why hasn’t he had a outbreak yet?

[Terri Warren]

It is certainly possible to have an index value of 8.95 after nine weeks, yes.
It is also possible that he’s had herpes along and has simply not had an outbreak

Terri.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by Terri Warren.

[bonnie_1987]

Would his igg not be higher if he had herpes all along? Does it grow over time?
Also I had first sores 20 days past sleeping with guy 2. Is this the sort of time frame to see first symptoms

[bonnie_1987]

Sorry one last question. You say it’s possible guy 1 had herpes all along.
Seeing as I now have herpes. Could I have had it all along 5 years ago and only just having outbreak now or would it be more likely that I would have had a outbreak in the 5 years

[Terri Warren]

20 days doesn’t fit very well with new infection. Normally we see sores within 2-10 days.
In order to know if your infection was old or new, you would have had to have had an antibody test that was negative at the first appearance your sores – did you have that?

Terri

[bonnie_1987]

Hi. Never had an antibody test at the beginning. I’ve been thinking back before guy 2 and I’ve definatly never had any sores.i haven’t seen any sores on Guy one in the 5 years together I did once go to the docs with him because his penis swelled up on one side his foreskin was huge and his lymph node in his groin was swollen. The doctor said maybe a blocked gland. Is this a sign of herpes? Also once after sex (we had no foreplay and quite dry) after he said he was sore (straight after within his 10 mins) next day on his penis just under head he was red and uncomfortable. Didn’t look like a sore maybe like a little split. Do these sound like herpes? It was only once and if that was herpes would he not have regular outbreaks and if he did have herpes would I not have caught it and had some type of outbreak in them 5 years? Do you think it’s guy 2 as I got sores first one quite bad 23 days after sex with guy 2? Or do you think I got herpes 5 years ago with guy 1 and only had outbreak after guy 2?

[Terri Warren]

Goodness, I just can’t help much more with this. The penis swelling and lymph node swelling could have been a herpes outbreak though you didn’t mention sores associated with this episode. And the dry sex incident doesn’t sound like herpes at all.

If I had to bet, I would put my money on partner 1 but that is clearly a guess. You aren’t going to be able to sort this out with certainty

Terri

[bonnie_1987]

Can you tell me for what reasons you think guy 1 please?
Surely if guy 1 I would have had outbreak within the 5 years? My first outbreak was pretty servire and that was 3 weeks after guy 2? Also you say the swollen foreskin and lymph node could have been herpes outbreak. Have u seen cases where the whole one side of penis swells? Twice the size? No sores envolved with the swelling? Also I’m confused as in your earlier reply you said to me that as I had a outbreak shortly after guy 2 and no sores in the 5 years with guy 1 you would think guy 2 was more likely?
Please explain reasons for which person you think

• This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by bonnie_1987.

[Terri Warren]

As I stated previously, the timing from acquiring this from guy 2 seems unlikely. 20 days is long from exposure to have a first outbreak but not impossible. So it’s possible it’s from guy 2 but because of the TIMING I think guy 1 is more likely. You keep asking me why I think guy 1 and I think that because of the timing of the first outbreak.

I have seen cases where the entire side of the penis swells, yes, with new herpes, as the lymph nodes become blocked from swelling and lymph drainage is not allowed to leave the penis.

As I have said to you already, I honestly cannot say and no matter how you ask the question, I still cannot say with any certainty. I’ve said all I can about this thread. It is now closed. I hope you can move on from this question. it is clearly bugging you.

Terri

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