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Worried about having infected new partner

› Forums › Herpes Questions › Worried about having infected new partner

  • This topic has 3 replies, 2 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 11 months ago by Terri Warren.
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    • July 14, 2015 at 2:48 pm #8134
      derbygirl21
      Spectator

      I’m a recently divorced female and had protected intercourse with a new partner 2 days ago. This is a partner whom I have a potential for a relationship and am very concerned I infected him. I’ve been on 1g of Valtrex for over a year. It had been a while since I had had intercourse and with my ex-husband it was usually brief. This intercourse was vigorous with a lot of friction. I was really sore but so be expected since it had been a while and the level of friction. The day after, I noticed I had my first lesion in 6 months. The lesion is always in the same place – at the bottom of my vaginal opening. You actually have to pull the skin down to see it. A couple of times before we had sex, he lied on top of me and his penis rubbed on the outside of my vagina briefly before he put on a condom, so there was skin to skin but not in the area of where I get a lesion. My question is do people typically only shed where they have lesions? If so, he was completely covered and there was no skin to skin. Would the rubbing around the outside for a minute or two (not inside the lips or the area of lesion) put him at risk since I never had a lesion in that area? I would have abstained if I had any idea one was coming on. I did disclose my status to him before intercourse and he was fine with it. Thank you!

    • July 14, 2015 at 4:21 pm #8138
      Terri Warren
      Keymaster

      The Valtrex should also reduce the amount of virus present in any lesions, so that’s a good thing. Condoms reduce the risk of transmission by about half or so, as does the antiviral therapy. I expect his risk of getting herpes in the situation your describe is really low indeed, just not zero. You did all the right things in terms of telling him first, condom use and Valtrex. You did all that you could do. The rubbing outside for just a bit has a small risk but certainly not a large one.

      Terri

    • July 14, 2015 at 4:38 pm #8139
      derbygirl21
      Spectator

      Thank you for your prompt response. Is it true that the places on I have lesions (I’ve only ever had 2 locations), are the places where you typically shed the virus?

    • July 15, 2015 at 2:19 pm #8171
      Terri Warren
      Keymaster

      well, yes, there, but other places are possible as well. The anus is a common site of shedding as well and other locations on the labia are likely.

      Terri

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