Bladder retention can be (but not often is) a symptom of herpes because the virus infects the nerves and make them dysfunctional in some people for a little while. I don’t think your description fits the urinary retention that I normally see. I would agree that manual stimulation of the genital area may well be to blame for the irritation that you feel. It’s amazing, too, what our minds can do to trick us into focusing on minor sensations when we are worried about something, isn’t it?
Terri