I am surprised that your doctor does not read the prestigious New England Journal of Medicine where Dr. Lawrence Corey published the paper (and I am also an author) showing that daily antiviral therapy reduces the transmission of herpes by almost 50%. Perhaps you should print out a copy and send it to him. It was published in the January 2004 edition, I believe. Such an effective tool for reducing transmission yet he discourages it. I’m really shocked.
I think you may be looking at this incorrectly. You want to know that your shedding is very very minimized or gone and that you aren’t really having prodrome. I think a shift in your thinking at this point would be most helpful. I would encourage you to think this way: We know that herpes can be transmitted when there are no symptoms whatsoever, not even prodrome. So there is a chance you could infect this person. But this person knows about the herpes and is willing to take the chance of infection. So your task now is to live with his decision. You have done absolutely everything you can. You are heavily invested in controlling your herpes situation. But the reality is that you can’t control everything about this situation, no matter how hard your try. Nor, do I think, that you should try to control his life. I assume he is a grown up. Let him make his own informed decisions! If he gets infected, he does. Period. His choice. You have nothing to feel guilty about.
Also, I am assuming that he has been tested?
Terri