March 9, 2015 at 3:09 pm #5422

Spectator

I am concerned because I love my wife. This has torn me up inside and I am afraid to bring something into our home that affects her and my child possibly. I’ve lost 20 pounds since December and it’s hard to sleep at night.

So far, from my timelime above, I’ve just suffered a variety of symptoms for 12 weeks with no visible blisters and have seen a multitude of doctors, all of them trying to reassure me that it’s not herpes. I had a IGM/IGG blood test in January and IGM in Feb and both came back negative. I had a IGM/IGG test last week and should get the results tomorrow.

As for the other woman, she claims she was tested back in 2012 and negative. It is difficult to believe someone that allowed me to hurt my family. As for contact, I have not spoken to her since early January and emotionally it’s difficult to try to speak to her again.

I knew my wife had tested positive for HSV-1 when she took a test in 2012. My wife said she thinks she had a cold sore as a kid. In the time I’ve been with her, lived with her and married her, we’ve been together since 2004. I’ve never seen an outbreak on my wife. That being said… I love my wife. If I caught HSV-1 from her… I promised to love her in sickness and in health. While I haven’t been a perfect husband, I’m afraid of the other woman giving me HSV-2. Then what happens, my wife is hit with a double whammy?

I just want closure, for me and my wife. I want to move on into the next phases of our lives. I’m emotional as I type this. I need clarification of my symptoms, do they indicate herpes? I need advice. It’s very hard to live this way. Now that I have been honest with my wife, I am hoping she will forgive me and we can continue our marriage. The guilt was so overwhelming sometimes I wonder if it’s made me sick.

As I said, I don’t care if I get it from my wife. I promised to love her despite any illness. Of course I would like to minimize risk, and definitely for our child. I want our child to experience life and not feel different. I have been afraid to hug her or kiss her for fear of her catching something. I get extreme anxiety about that.

Again, what I want is clarification of my symptoms, do they indicate herpes? And I need advice. Thank you.