If he has oral herpes but has never had a genital outbreak, it seems unlikely that he has HSV 1 in both locations. I think unprotected with you seems very low risk, to try to get pregnant. He know he has it orally but does not know that he has it genitally, if I’m reading this right. Semen is a poor carrier of HSV and if he has it genitally and has had it for six years, even if he had it genitally, he would be shedding very very rarely. I think he is likely being overly cautious. If he refuses to ejaculate inside of you, he could ejaculate in a jar and use a turkey baster to put the semen inside of you. NO need for IVF
Terri